Thursday, March 29, 2007

Old Blogging part 8 - On giving advice to new parents.

When you have a baby everybody thinks they can tell you what to do! From friends and relatives to complete strangers on the street and in the supermarket.
In fact when I was preggers a lady in the supermarket told me I shouldn't be carrying so much. What I wanted to say (should have say) was "Oh, does that mean you are going to carry these home for me or are you suggesting that I don't need to eat?"
Now that I have the baby people tell me all about how he's not dressed warmly enough, or too warm. They tell me I'm carrying him too much or not enough. I even had a woman on the bus (a complete stranger who engaged me even though I tried to ignore her) that I absolutely must have another child or this one will have mental problems. So according to the bus lady all you only children out there are damaged goods. I've also been told that I'm depriving him if I don't give him a pacifier (I really hate them! And it's my choice. If you want to give one to your child please be my guest.) and that he will deform his face unless I stop him from sucking his thumb. People often look at me like I'm completely bonkers because I have real conversation with my child. Sure, his responses are severely limited, but I know he understands a hell of a lot more than people think. I don't care if you think I'm nuts, while my child is out there changing the world and making a difference, yours will be watching TV.
Oh and another thing, DON'T GIVE MY KID FOOD WITHOUT ASKING ME FIRST! Maybe you feed your kid cheesey and cookies and pop. Well I don't. He's gonna eat all kinds of junk when he gets older and there's nothing I can do about that. But I can give him a good start and control what he's eating now. So ask me before you offer him something becasue I may not want him to have it.
Why do so many people think they are experts on child rearing? Even people who don't have children or whose children are now in their thirties? What makes them think that I so desperately need help? And by the way, it's not just me the other mothers at playgroup (whom I actually listen too because they also have young children and may actually give good advice) have the same problem.
So next time you're thinking about giving a new Mom advice, unless she's endangering her child or shaking her baby, just remember she doesn't want to hear it and don't be offended if she tells you to f**k right off.
Thanks for reading this bitch fest. I makes me feel a little better to complain, and it probably keeps me from going off on total strangers when the stick their nose in my business.

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